A Life As Mundane As It Can Be Glorious
I have been doing some thinking this week.
Thinking about many things of course, but mostly about this blog.
About what I post and, perhaps more importantly, why I do what I do here. Because, when I started this about a year ago now, I am pretty sure this is not exactly what I had in mind. So I thought that perhaps it might be timely to spend a moment or two reviewing my thoughts and trying to understand what this is really all about.
I guess the best place to start is on the “About” page.
“She Called This Idyllic is a collection of images and thoughts about normal life in a beautiful world.”
There you go. Pretty simple and straight forward. I live a very normal life and try to remind myself to stop and smell the roses every now and again.
I suspect however that it has evolved a little since I wrote that.
When I started doing this it was mostly about the photographs. I have had a passion for photography for as long as I can remember. I love trying to make images that are challenging, beautiful and sometimes just plain weird. And whilst I enjoyed playing around with words, they always seemed to come second to what I could see and record through a viewfinder.
And there was a good reason for that. Whilst I can sometimes feel an element of satisfaction when I take a photograph that I think is good, I find it almost impossible to appreciate or like anything that I write.
Let me clarify that a little.
I just don’t feel good about my writing.
A feeling that most people who try to write probably share, but also a statement of fact that allows me to lead nicely into a little self-analysis.
This blog has become important to me, I think, for a number of reasons.
Reasons over and above the photographs, although I still love taking and posting photos as much as before.
And also, despite my perception of my own writing, not just because of the obvious benefits of writing a diary or journal to record how I have been living my life. Something that, rather perversely perhaps, I also seem to enjoy.
But it is that element of encouraging myself to see the beauty, the positives, of the world that surrounds me, that seems to have grown in significance. Indeed, as I have mentioned previously in posts, I find myself being drawn to see the good in people that I meet, no matter who they may be or how transient their appearance in my world, far more frequently these days.
And here is possibly the point that is perhaps the most important for me.
It is proving to be beneficial to my mental heath.
There. I have said it.
Doing this makes me feel better about myself.
And it helps me to push beyond some of the preconceived limits and views that I have of myself, which is no bad thing bearing in mind how they have developed and become quite significant obstacles for me over the years.
And whilst I am not about to dive in to a detailed and personal account of my mental health issues, because, lets face it, everyone seems to do that on social media or in blogs these days and it can sometimes feel almost competitive, I do think it is important to be honest. At the risk of upsetting my wife by using her least favourite word, I think authenticity is key.
So I try to be myself when I post. And I try to get over my additional fears, no, my certainty, that no-one will like what I share or write. And by doing this I am pushing my boundaries even further than I ever believed was possible.
And forcing some of my old comfort zones to take a back seat.
So maybe there is an element of therapy about thinking in a more focused way and then sharing those thoughts in here. It certainly seems to be a great way of identifying and recording my gratitude for the life that I have. And that is a path that frequently leads to increased happiness and contentment.
To give this a level of balance however, I also know that there are very few people that read what I share. I know one or two that do, and I am grateful for their interest. But mostly, I write and share in the knowledge that whilst anyone could read or see my posts, literally anyone, no-one actually does.
So I guess it is like taking a massive leap of faith whilst knowing you still have the safety net of obscurity lurking beneath you. Enough to challenge your boundaries but not sufficient to scare you back into the gloom of inaction.
And that knowledge, in its own way, allows me to keep this going.
So She Called This Idyllic is mostly about my own selfish and creative interests, of course, but also, thankfully, for reasons that have a little more depth to them. Encouragement to see the best that my world has to offer whilst allowing myself to feel better about who I really am. Not quite what I had in mind when I dared to write my first post last year, but none-the-less, something that offers purpose to a life that is as mundane as it can be glorious.